this is the week of people.

so, after being a hermit for over a week....it has now become the time to meet up with people.

in some ways, i'm excited to see old high school friends. staying at home and doing nothing but reading and sleeping is great...but only for a day or two.

meeting up with old friends, however, is sometimes hard (i guess it depends on which friends eh?)...and brings back old reminders of times of hurt. i'm glad that the God who brings the dead to life and calls things into existence that at one time did not exist is the same God who has renewed me and given me new life. i'm not the person i once was...and this comforts me.

So.....pray for me this week as i meet up with dear friends. its going to bel ovely and hard.

p.s. i have great pictures of the mountain wendy and i hiked up in Banff (thanks for an AWESOME weekend wendy!!) but alas, i'm not on my own computer...so i can't put them up.

THIS is the mountain we hiked up though.

oh and here's two pictures that wendy put up on her blog of me, Chris and some of wendy's friends on Sunday. Pete's drive in is DONCULOUSLY RAD! check out Wendy's blog for an explanation of the donculously large fries.

missing the wedding of the century.

today everyone cool went to the wedding of the century (by everyone cool, i mean the vast majority of montreal 2005 projectiles + carleton)...

but instead of going i went hiking up a mountain with another short chinese girl. since i couldn't be at the wedding, hiking up a mountain is a donculously good second. PLUS, we went to the sulfur springs and swam around.

i'm sad about missing the wedding of the century, but i'm rejoicing with them...even though i'm in alberta.

congrats to:

Christina and Sangi!


AND
also another donculously cool couple who got married today....

MICHAEL and MARIE. felicitations mike!!! desolee, je ne pouvais pas etre la pour ton celebration...mais j'espere que c'etait magnifique!!!

in cowtown with the wonderful miss wendy chien.

i think the title says it all.


p.s. corporate worship and studying the Bible with other people is just SO fantastic. even when you don't know anyone you're with. one in the Spirit.

yay for the Calgary C4Cers.

all i want for christmas are my two teeth.

well not really. the teeth are out, and i feel great. there's been no bleeding, and i haven't really needed to take any meds. so thats the down low on the teeth.

in other news, have you ever been given a gift that you don't want? Its not unlike that Jesus with the sheep picture (i think its a picture of Jesus?) that keeps circulating around Ryerson because Ryan Kirk didn't want it. No one wants it, so they keep on giving it away at Christmastime and such.

Well, there are just some days that i don't want the gifts i've been given. Most of the time, however, its for selfish reasons. i don't want the hassle of dealing with the gift; having the gift means using it, and using it may not always reap the most pleasant results.

So why am i rambling on about Christmas gifts in August? Well, the truth is...sometimes, i think of my spiritual gifts as a hassle. i forget that these are GOOD gifts given by the Spirit for the common good. i forget that these gifts are not just for me to hoard, that i haven't done anything to deserve them and that it is the Spirit who has generously invested these gifts to me.

there are days however, when i just don't want to heed God and use these gifts. sometimes, its so much easier not to. it's almost akin to being given a vacuum for Christmas. a vacuum is a great gift. it makes your house clean and gets rid of dust, so that you and your family (and visitors) can enjoy the house without suffering from dirt and allergic reactions. BUT, sometimes its just such a hassle (in chinese, we say its ma fan) to vacuum every day. its not always fun and it requires work to use it. after a couple of months, we forget that this vacuum cleaner was a gift to us, and we are no longer grateful for this wretched treasure.

often times, the LORD brings to mind things that He wants me to point out to people. He points out some truth that He would like me to speak to my close friends. This, i would consider the gift of prophecy--speaking truth into the lives of others. Often times, it'll be doing my quiet times, or praying for friends that i receive these little gems of wisdom from the LORD; it is by no means me passing judgement on my friends (although, if i'm not careful and i allow my pride to swell, i can end up judging them), but rather the LORD wanting me to point out something to them. Often times, its just a small thing, nothing huge...but after noticing these things, i mull over the decision to say something to them for a long time. i know what the LORD wants me to do, what He wants me to say...but my untrusting and doubtful heart gets in the way. i worry about what my friends will say back to me; i worry that they will no longer be my friends. i'd rather run to Tarshish than go to Nineveh.

fundamentally, what this says to me, is that
a) i often prize my friends over my LORD
b) i love myself more than my friends: i am often stubborn and unwilling to point out a sin or some character trait that Abba wants to mould and work on in their life, because i'm scared that they won't like me. instead of caring more about their walk with the LORD and with others, i care more about myself. hmm...loving my life more than the LORD? mm...not such a great idea. its a bit tautological, since it is Jesus Christ who gives me life.
c) i don't trust the living Spirit in me. i don't trust that it is He who has given me these gifts and who is at work, empowering me to be His hands and feet. i fail to trust in the promise that for those who love God all things work together for good.

what does the Bible have to say about this?

a) Do not love the world or the things in the world. if anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.....and the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever. (1 Jn 15, 17)

b) Again, if a righteous person turns from his righteousness and commits injustice, and I lay a stumbling block before him, he shall die. because you have not warned him, he shall die for his sin, and his righteous deeds that he has done shall not be remembered, but his blood i shall require at your hand. But if you warn the righteous person not to sin and he does not sin, he shall surely live, because he took warning, and you will have delivered your soul. (Ezekiel 3:20-21)

c) and there are a variety of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. (1 Cor 12:6-7)

hmm, i suppose at the core is a prideful, unbelieving heart. and yet, why am i unbelieving when i have seen His goodness and experienced His grace? Often times my love for the world clouds my desire to prize Him above all else. And yet, when everything is said and done, and the world is no more, the only One i will have is Him. thus, like our forefathers in the Bible, my goal should be not to love myself...but to love, cherish, obey and glorify the One who made me. this may mean speaking truth into the lives of others when i am unsure of how they will react. but my foothold should not be found in their friendship (although friendship is a lovely thing), but rather, in Christ, the solid rock.

oklahoma.

i don't know what the title has to do with anything. but i have that song in my head. you know, the one that goes "oklahoma when the wind comes sailing down the plains" or something like that....

again, i don't know how long this connection is going to last for. alberta is always representative of internet withdrawal at its finest.

but i'ma going to make a list of things i'll blog about when i get back. this is just so i don't forget. SOoooo...stay tuned for news on..

- getting the wisdom teeth out monday morning (i'm going to try to put a you tube video up when i get back to Toronto, so that y'all can see the puffiness and the high on tylenol 3s.)

- told my parents about my decision re: job after graduation tonight.

- i am a daddy's girl

- redneck albertans....okay alberta, lobster is NOT a chinese thing. i seriously think lots of people eat lobster. there is no reason to be creeped out at the sight of lobster. get cultured will ya?

- people love my "i love Jesus" t-shirt.

- skipped church this morning (i'm a heathen, i know. long story.) but listened to an awesome Rick James sermon and talked to my Australian cousin; i couldn't understand half of the things he said.

- Edmonton is beautiful. seriously, donculously beautiful. a bit chilly though.

- my dogs are the cutest things alive.

- Twelve Extraordinary Women is a solid read.

- i keep wanting to call friends in ontario, but i also keep on forgetting about the time difference, remembering only at 9pm, when its already 11pm there.

- air canada does not give snacks on their flights. a bag of peanuts costs 2 dollars.

- seriously, my parents have the nicest garden ever. people actually stop by the garden while they're walking by (the back of our house faces a field) and stare. i'm excited to do my devos on this little bridge thing they have going over a "pond".

- i feel nice and relaxed.

i'ma headed back to the wasteland.


i think the title says it all....

okay, admittedly, its not REALLY a wasteland (let it be known that unless you're from deadmonton, you are not permitted to make fun of it. yes! hypocrisy at its finest. right here, ladies and gents).

i'm pretty much sad. going home to edmonton means that the end of the summer is quickly approaching. this makes me teary eyed because i've had a GREAT summer. its been phenom. even just today, i met up with Adam Lim and Daniel Richardsen and we went to Kensington market where we had the BEST burritos EVER! Seriously, their yam burrito is fit for a superstar. We also had amazing ice cream/gelato (i had pistachio gelato...mmm amazing!) at this fair trade certified cafe, and i bought a button for two dollars. it says: "Eat vegetables, don't be a vegetable."
today was just an sampling of the fantasmic times i've had in Toronto this summer.

lets be honest though. every year, before going back to edmonton, i feel a sense of trepidation and dread. its always almost inevitable that i'll get in an argument with my mum (we're both very stubborn and feisty) or that a sense of extreme loneliness will set in. the truth is, edmonton is where i have to fight my demons. its where the rubber hits the road, and spiritual breathing isn't about getting warm fuzzies, but necessary to survive. its where everything i've learned during the year is tested, and its where i often fail.

i don't mean to bemoan going home. i am grateful for loving parents who have supported me throughout my lifetime, and am eager to see them. i am grateful for many high school friends--most of whom i love seeing, because many of them represent at least a 6 year history...this year, it'll be 10 years since i met a whackload of them in grade 7.

nevertheless, going home is going to be tough. there are always numerous reasons. the main thing being that i don't have a home church to go to. i have no christian friends left in edmonton, and thus its like leaving a spiritual greenhouse where there are structures and support and going into a desert, where the solitude stretches for miles. there's also so much i want to do, so much i want to accomplish. i want to love my friends, i want to share the gospel with them, i want to inspire my parents to keep on pushing on, i want to spend lots of time with God, i want to honour my parents. but often, i leave, with my goals being unmet. going back is always a good reminder of the sinner that i truly am, but while i am there, i often forget the Grace that will bring me home.

this time though, i do not want to forget this grace. i don't want to go home with the pressure of "doing" things. its not as though my constant striving to "do" things will impress the LORD. unlike being a good enough student to skip a grade, there are no extra brownie points for attempting to do things on my own and prove that i am good enough and strong enough. there needs to be the realization that i am neither of the two.
there needs to be the realization that i am justified by grace as a gift through the redemption that is in Jesus Christ, whom God put forward as a propitiation by His blood to be received by faith.

while i admit to being anxious about going home, i am also excited. i'm excited for the down-time i'll have (especially since i'm getting my wisdom teeth out on monday), and i'm excited to read some good books and simply veg. i'm excited to have unhurried and constant solid times with God and to have only Him to rely on. i'm excited to get away from the clutter that is Toronto life. i'm excited to eat the best pho i've ever had and not need to do grocery shopping. i'm excited to be away from the internet and not be able to blog-stalk 24/7.

pray for me if you get a chance.

and call me. i'm sure i'll be bored, and i'd love to talk to anyone who wants to talk to me ^_^
email me for my phone number.

i'll be back september stinking 4th.

okay....

so i read this, and got a little teary eyed. it was a good reminder.

***

its hard when you realize that you and a close friend have grown apart. you just don't want to acknowledge it. but that distance still exists, regardless of whether you admit its there or not. its easier to swallow when its due to a fight or due to some other tangible reason. but when its just because you've both changed, its a hard thing to face. sometimes, its a sad thing--knowing that you'll always be friends, but you just won't be friends the way you were before.

ah well. c'est la vie!

can i just say that Ben Lee was AMAAAAZING!!!!!!!!!

he was SUCH a cutie patutie...and a natural performer!

LOOOVED it.

so glad i went.

IN YOUR FACE McGILL!!!

and a random picture from last night's adventure at Ten Ren's.

haha okay really random question to anonymous...

if i guessed who you are...would you tell me if i'm right?

(i guess that would defeat the purpose of being anonymous...so you probably wouldn't. thats okay too.)

okay, i know i said i'd hit a dry spell. but i've been inspired to pose a question. i've been thinking about it for awhile now-- talked it over with Sara Whitfield and Nathan Onifrichuk (both of whom brought up the question separately) and realized that it is a question many people ask. So here i am. at the risk of sounding polemical, i'm ready to pose the question and am also seeking your opinions.

At what point did it become the Christian mentality for girls to sit around and pretty much 'twiddle thumbs' until a guy asks them to start a relationship? i realize i need to qualify this here, because there will be some outcries of rage. i know its not really 'twiddling thumbs'--the goal of anyone (whether married or single) should be to glorify God and use the gifts He has given us to do so and to edify others. Thus, in singlehood, as a female, the overaching purpose of my life should be serving God and utilizing this special time of singlehood to do so. it should be to strive towards becoming the proverbs 31/titus 2 woman. Since four out of the seven commands for women in Titus 2 are applicable, irrespective of marital status, we, as single women, need to be upholding these commands and putting them into practice.

What i do mean, however, is that in the majority of Christian circles (especially among early twenty-somethings) the paradigm is that of guy initiating and girl responding. it seems to be frowned upon for a girl to even let on that she is interested, prior to a guy initiating. it is DEFINITELY less than desirable for a girl to ask a guy to start a relationship, but this isn't solely what i am speaking of. i speak of a girl merely showing interest before a guy initiating anything. where did this idea of girls doing nothing to show interest at all before a guy does anything come about?

in fact, with most of my christian girlfriends...if they like someone, and that someone hasn't expressed an interest, they'll actually spend less time with this person, than they would with any other guy friend. we'll erect multiple guards (in an attempt to guard the heart) and stay farther away from the said person instead of getting to know the person more in the hopes that perhaps later on, he too will develop feelings for us.
the said person finding out that he is liked prior to him saying anything is horrifying, and the thought of that happening is enough to warrant a the onslaught of a panic attack.

do not get me wrong--i am not a raging feminist here. in fact, i do not hold to the current views of feminism (note the word "current" which is very different than past views of feminism) because i believe, to quote Mark Driscoll, that men should responsibly lead homes and the church with a sacrificial love like Jesus Christ. And, i'm not saying i would WANT to ask a guy out--i would much rather prefer a guy to ask me to begin a relationship...and most godly guys i know would prefer it to be that way as well. What i am asking is: is it so wrong to show interest in a guy before he has stated (implicitly or explicitly) that he is interested?

i think its an interesting question to consider, and definitely stirs up the pot and shakes up our 'christian' paradigms.

where did the way we do dating evolve from? the Bible? or culture? why do younger Christians never go out on dates (its either i'm in a relationship or i'm single)? why do females have to sit around without doing anything at all, instead of indicating an interest in someone?

i realize that a response to this would be that men were created to be leaders, and so taking initiative is fundamental in being a leader. however, like my friend nathan stated, "knowing this, am i just regurgitating it because its what i've been taught, or do i actually believe it?" And if this 'leadership paradigm' is your response, then the question i would pose in response is...what about Ruth? Was her going up to Boaz unbiblical? hmm. that doesn't really make sense. Doing what she did TODAY however, would be quite counter-cultural.

at any rate, the preamble to my question was lengthy, but i think was necessary to pose the questions i did above. so now, its your turn! comment away (if possible back up your response with biblical references please)! i'm all ears.

i've hit a dry spell in terms of blogging. there hasn't been anything worthwhile to read here in quite a bit of time. if i were a writer, i'd be worried. thoughts would come to my head... "maybe you're past your prime" etc. the good news is, i am not a writer (although, i do aspire to be one, sometimes. a little dreaming here and there can't hurt) and there is no way i could be past my prime, seeing as i haven't hit 20 yet. good mathematicians have until they're at least 25 or 26 to come up with an ingenious proof, and look at C.S. Lewis. Minus his poetry, he didn't start writing fiction/non-fiction until he was 35.

i have lots of time (barring the event of death).

and so do you, apparently, if you've continued to read my blog during this dry spell.

but to quench your boredom, here are some links to some interesting articles i've been reading lately.

Plenty of Men to Go Around
Is Jack Bauer a type of Christ?
JR's Pastor on the Billy Graham in Newsweek Article
The Butt of too many jokes.
11 Universities bow out of Maclean's University Rankings

P.S. can i make a confession right now?
yesterday, when i was coming home from playing with church friends, they dropped me off at the subway station. as i was walking down the stairs, there was a sweater lying on the ground. i looked to see if anyone was around, but there was no one. There had been no one upstairs when i entered the station either. As i neared the turnstiles, i considered handing the sweater over to the dude inside the booth, but there was a huge lineup. so, instead i looked over all of the people heading past the booth--none of them would be remotely able to fit this sweater. So i walked through the turnstiles without handing the sweater over and took it home with me.
it fits beautifully. but i can't help but think that someone out there is missing their sweater. and its because i have it.
its as though i stole it, but not quite. AND its the first time i haven't turned something into lost and found.

oh, spotty morality.
maybe i should take it to the ttc station now? but that means a trek uptown..and if the person was actually looking for it, they'd have already asked the lost and found if it was there or not.
ahh what do i do?

AHHH... what a fun two days!!!!!

J was gracious and let me go with her to St. Catharines...so that i could watch the Henley.

we stopped at the IKEA in burlington where J did some shopping...and then had a little snack(yay for lingoberry drinks, frozen yogurt and a cinnamon bun)!

then we were off!

we got to J's house...and played with Bennett for a bit. he is SUCH a cutie pie. i wish i had more pictures.

then we were off! we watched the last 2 races of the day...oh man, it was SO amazing. well...at least i found it amazing. the people racing were just amazingly good and it was tremendously exciting to watch their agility as their oars hit the water. J, didn't find it so exciting, but she was still great company. AND besides, we got to comment on the really cute guys. ha!

we went for dinner...all you can eat pasta. mmm...

and then for a walk on the pier. After this, J took me to ride on the 5cent carousel. we were DEFINITELY the only old people without children on the ride. but still! SOOO fun!!

then we went back to J's parent's place...and watched "When Harry met Sally." wow, its been a couple years since i've watched it...and its SCANDALOUS! haha. but some of it is just so darn funny. oy.

today, we went to watch the races again, went to home depot and went back to J's. her mum gave me these awesome home-grown cucumbers to take home. we ate fungi pizza for dinner (delicious!) and corn on the cob with her family..and then J drove me to the bus station, where i caught the bus home.

what a great time! it was SO relaxing. just what i needed. i'm so greatful for a woman like J in my life. she's a great model of a discipler AND like an older sister that i never had. her willingness to share her life with me has been a blessing. i love J! she's great.

thanks for a great time J!!!

Quote of the weekend: "tell him to sh*t or get off the can!"~D. M.

***

thought this was interesting. i've been enjoying mark driscoll's blog lately. at first i was a bit weary of him..seeing as he's the "cussing pastor" in Blue like Jazz. But he has a lot of good things to say, and from what it seems..pretty solid. he'll be speaking at the desiring God conference in September, and to quote johnny pipes, " [Mark] is radically reformed, calvinistic through and through, complementarian..."

at any rate, i don't know where i was going with that.

good times with Sara Whitfield on the phone.

as i talk on the phone with Sara.....she is saying such impressive things. i must record these things.


"i wish i was chinese because chinese are automatically more hot and more interesting. they don't even have to work at it. its really impressive actually."

"i wasn't lusting...i just looked at him and thought..'oh, thats good looking'. oh shoot. i am a luster."

***

oh man. i seriously am going to get a tumour in my brain one day from talking on my cell phone at night so much. oh well. sara whitfield is worth it.

say it ain't so billy...say it ain't so.

why is it that whenever one is studying, lots of things to discuss come to mind? namely crack addicts, crack addicts who work as prostitutes and billy graham.

the former two and the latter are not related.
***
i've heard a great deal of hubbub about Billy Graham lately--especially after the article in Newsweek about him. So i decided to hop down to the corner news store and buy myself a copy. as i sat reading, waiting for class to start, my heart pounded and there was definite grating as i read two lines:
"i'm not a literalist [about the Bible] in that every jot and tittle is from the Lord."
and
" When asked whether he believes heaven will be closed to good Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus or secular people, though Graham says:' [...]it would be foolish for me to speculate on who will be [in heaven] and who won't...I don't want to speculate on who will be there and who won't.... I believe the love of God is absolute. He said he gave his son for the whole world, and I think he loves everybody regardless of what label they have.'"

i have to get studying...so i won't comment on the article right now. its available online (click the link above). i'd love to hear your opinions on it.

***
we watched Black Tar Heroin in class today.
i cried on the way home.

now i am leaving to study. final exam #1 tomorrow. stressing over it seems so shallow compared to kids my age who are on the streets selling themselves at 20 dollars for a blow job and 40 dollars for the whole nine yards... in order to sustain their crack habits (and to keep themselves alive...since withdrawal could potentially kill them).

i dunno.

***

edit 11:30pm:

okay i know i'm supposed to be studying. but i was taking a break...checking out some news at desiringgod.org.

apparently during his sabbatical, Piper has been writing a book as a response to N.T. Wright on the doctrine of justification.
since talk of N.T. Wright's theology seemed to appear a great deal when i was interning this summer in Montreal, i am excited to hear that Piper is working on a book highlighting the fallacies of Wright's theology (namely pertaining to justification). can't wait!

don't worry..its not another video of me.



***

John Piper on the Emergent Church
click here

***
also..Monica on Marriage
click here. and make sure to read the comments too. they're a worthwhile read.

YES!!!!!

okay... so i DEFINITELY won't make it to the end of Romans by the time September 5th hits. but i am LOVING this no msn thing..

every morning since thursday (except sunday) i've spent about 1 hour memorizing Romans 3....and now i'm done! God is good eh? its definitely a supernatural thing to be able to know the Word, memorize it and be able to wield it as a sword. i'm thankful for the workings of the Holy Spirit--without Him, i would NOT be able to do this.

but surprisingly, not only am i able....i'm finding it SUPER fun. haha, there's nothing like saying the word circumcision over and over again and knowing that your roommate's boyfriend in the next room can probably hear you.

good times.

a result of a boredom crisis.

Abolish side hugs and bring in "Les Becs".

i detest side hugs. i think they should be abolished forever and a day. you know....those awkward "christian" hugs that girls and guys give each other; the ones where they stand arms length apart and tap each other on the shoulders. i label these "christian" hugs, because i've NEVER had to give a non-christian friend a cheesy "i don't want you to lust, so i'm going to stand ten million feet away from you and tap your shoulder" hug.

granted, i am not a natural hugger (come on! i'm chinese. everyone knows that many traditional chinese families are not touchy feely). But even I find these hugs awkward!

of course, i understand how frontal hugs might be awkward and not entirely edifying for some people. This is why Quebecois have things figured out. "Les becs" should be exported to the rest of Canada.
In Quebec (and other parts of the world) people greet with two cheek kisses, one on each cheek...this is a greeting that i love! Its so warm and casual. It eliminates the problem that frontal hugs are just TOO much body for some people, but ALSO eliminates the awkward side hugs.

the only problem is.... since its not common elsewhere in Canada you get UBER awkwardnes. what do i mean?

well. how do becs work? first you shake the person's hand, and use that to pull them closer to you. Someone who is used to doing this will just stick out their cheek. BUT...for people who aren't used to this, they'll think you want to hug them and that you're pulling them in for a hug. The end result is that you're moving in to touch your cheek to their cheek, and they end up moving in for a hug..and you end up with your cheek to their neck or something mayo like that.

AWKWARD!

its really a tragedy, because its the best greeting out there. maybe the closest to greeting someone with a holy kiss? hehe.

so to all those who read this blog. lets aim to export les becs from quebec.

quote of the weekend:

"joel sherman, i almost always call people by their first and last name (with a few exceptions to the norm)."
"WHAT? no way!"
"yes."
"no...wait....YES! you do! i can't believe i never realized that!"

***

in other news. i went to my first softball game this weekend. i love my church.

OKAY SERIOUSLY. MONTREAL 2005..WHAT IS GOING ON!!!!

these freaking e-mails are KILLING ME!!!!

between last night and tonight...there are THOUSANDS!!!!! i'd take a good estimate at getting around 10 000 emails since this whole thing started.

they seriously won't stop coming!! the worst thing is...their frequency is increasing. i'm getting about 14 every minute now.

in less than 14 hours i've gotten over 5000 e-mails..maybe even seven thousand. and no matter HOW much i keep on deleting..they just keep on coming! SOMEONE MAKE IT STOP!!!!!! The gmail is my account...i deleted before church today..... the hotmail is my friend Sara's account....i don't think she's checked her e-mail since last night. WHAT THE FREAK!!!!.

edit: so i called the guy who created the mailing list and such....his parents answered. he's in bolivia..and it may be 24 hours until they get in touch with him.

BUT, i figured out what's going on. its an exponential increase...because as more and more people's inboxes are filled, the error e-mails being sent to them are bouncing back to everyone on the e-mail list....all this to say.... KEEP CLEANING OUT YOUR INBOXES MONTREAL PROJECT..because if you don't and your e-mail becomes full..you're increasing the amount of e-mails everyone else on the mailing list are getting.

awww...i love friends.

after a day of almost no human contact...i got a lovely phone call from sara whitfield. we talked for about 1 hour, and then i called joel sherman and talked to him for another hour and a half.

gotta love great pals.

joel sherman and sara whitfield...i heart y'all!

Edit: 9:00pm

Wow...i just realized. in exactly one month, i'll have been alive for two decades.

the crummy thing about skipping a grade and consequently having a vast majority of friends being a year older than you...is that the whole big 2-0 thing is completely passe. i'm not one for birthday countdowns/birthday parties...sometimes they seem too attention seeking/superfluous. but still... in one month, when september 5th hits, i think i MIGHT just do a little dance. OOOH you know what would be fun? lets get dressed up...and go play in a park. that would be FANTASTIC. lets doooo it!

oh, and father of the bride= cutest movie!!

okay, so i'm hooked on some really good eats. get this loveliness:

organic whole wheat pitas, pizza sauce, bbq diana sauce, tex-mex cheese and tofu (fried with the same bbq sauce), baked in the oven. oh mylanta. it was AMAZING. in combination with a apricot-raisin salad (introduced to me by a good friend) with a pear guava dressing, and almond milk...its obvious that i had a party of a dinner...all while watching Father of the Bride.

one last thing. i am currently listening to Cyndi Lauper. *hangs head in shame*

but..... "Girls just wanna have fun" is so darn catchy!

okay, so joshua robinson introduced me to this band....they're just great. goodbye cyndi lauper. hello asobi seksu. (i don't really know about their name though....its a bit...scandalous.)

okay, so...i am in search of a girl friend to go with me to see Ben Lee-- August 17th. please please please say yes! i would love you if you came with me.

***

Also, click HERE for a great article by Carolyn McCulley.

ahh, what a grand day. lots of time spent memorizing the Word... mm Romans, you are like a fine wine. you only get more exciting with time.

PLUS...i made a t-shirt! Well..technically American Apparel made it (2 for 25 sale on!)...but i added some fun to it! Check it out ^_^ The pics actually makes the t-shirt brighter than it actually is....its a golden-mustard colour with dark purple font.
Front and Back.

OH, and get this.

went to rowing today...biked in the rain to get there.....but once i got there...the water was SO calm. it was almost like glass. Anyways, i digress. I THINK I'VE FOUND MYSELF A DOUBLES PARTNER!!! she's a bit older..maybe late 20s? But we're a pretty good match in terms of weight. She's new (it was her second time sculling) but she definitely has potential, and i'm excited to coach her. i'm SO excited. no more of this sweeping in an eight. HUZZAH!!!!

***

i want to have some sort of adventure this weekend. but so many cool people are going out of town. i wish i was a creative artsy bohemian. i would create adventures for me, myself and i.

***

oh, and whoever hasn't heard Ben Lee's Catch my Disease...hm. you should listen to it. its so CATCHY. i'm not sure about the lyrics...but i LOOOVE the toy piano....if i ever make a recording, i too will find a toy piano and use it to my advantage.

goodbye msn trial #onemillion and one.

i've tried this often..but i've always come back. this time i am taking an msn hiatus for an extended period of time.

this is how it will work: i will not come back online until i have finished memorizing Romans.

(unless i need something urgently from a classmate or friend)

last summer, i made it my goal to memorize Romans by the time i turned 20. it definitely has not happened. i stalled when i hit the end of chapter 2. i highly doubt i'll make it by September 5th..but we'll see.

however, there's a lot of people who i love to talk to on msn....but i've learned that more fruitful friendships happen in person or on the phone (a la sara whitfield) anyways.

So here's the deal. if you're willing to talk to me on the phone during this hiatus (i would dearly love for this to happen), leave a comment and i'll email you. if you're a good friend of mine (you know who you are) i'd ideally like to talk to you on the phone/in person once a week.
and...if you're not a good friend of mine...well then, i struggle to understand why you'd want to talk to me on the phone anyways. haha.
okie dokes. thats all i had to say.

The LORD is very very good.

okay, i know i'm just blogging away today...but i'm just SO excited!! i feel like i'm about to burst, and there's no one online to tell this to!

For the past couple of days, i've just felt very exhausted--physically and spiritually. The warfare on Sunday night was immense, and it was followed by crazy physical exhaustion yesterday.

But on Monday morning, i really prayed through Ephesians 6, and told God that despite ongoing warfare, i wanted to stand firm and speak the gospel boldly.

Today...i got my chance!!!

i had the opportunity to share (albeit a VERY diluted gospel presentation) with my whole class of about 65-70 students!!

We were watching some news clips pertaining to the Columbine tragedy in 1999, and they briefly interviewed Franklin Graham (son of Billy & Ruth Graham, and CEO of Samaritan's Purse) who said that the fundamental problem was sin, and that by taking God out of the classroom, the fundamental problems students were facing weren't being dealt with. He also said that the States would do well to bring back the 10 commandments into the classroom and that the spiritual void needs to be dealt with.

Anyways, upon hearing this, the majority of my class laughed out loud. after the clip, the professor asked if we had any comments...so ME..the girl who NEVER speaks in class..lifts up her hand and says, "i think it was a really poignant part of the film when Franklin Graham said that God should be brought back into the classroom...and i know that THIS classroom laughed about it, but i'm not sure what everyone found so funny. is what he said THAT absurd?

i mean, there's obviously fundamental problems that need to be dealt with in the way we raise children, and i don't see what is so wrong with having students KNOW that there is a God who loves them and who would give EVERYTHING, even His Son, so that he could know them. i think THAT is something that truly brings healing. Every child should know that God loves them and would even DIE for them and i don't think its an absurd thought."

there was a bit of uncomfortable silence...and then of course, people piped up..defending their laughter..saying that it was funny because it was Christianity, and that's why they laughed and such. But it was out there, and i think there were a lot of people who thought about what i had said.

Thus...now i am the "Christian girl" in class...and i'm grateful for it. Praise the Lord.

i've never had an affinity for anything Lord of the Rings.

tried to make it through the Hobbit when i was in jr. high...failed miserably. it was the most boring book i had ever read.

so when it became big, and everyone was jumping on the bandwagon...i stayed off.

Recently, however, my friend Suz invited me to come with her family and watch it with them for free. Wanting to see her, i said "sure"..but i was dreading it... i had heard critics bash it, and that it was 3.5 hours long... i thought i would surely die.

mmmm..

IT WAS AMAZING!!! i'm not sure about the storyline and such....but the music was BEAUTIFUL and oh my, the set design, lighting and costumes were PHENOMENAL.

seriously. it was a great afternoon. still haven't jumped on the LOTR bandwagon though. i don't plan on reading/watching the movies anytime soon.

p.s.

does anyone know of a lomographic store in Toronto or Edmonton?

i'm currently on a search for a Color Flash Holga and a Fisheye.

i'm hesitant to buy them online, because i think there may be some steals at small shops in the city.

if anyone knows...let me know!

addendum: okay i've found some stores. now, who would like to accompany me to these wonderful stores..which appear to be quite exciting and vintage-y? who, of my friends who ENJOYS perusing through vintage stuff would like to accompany me?

Holga..you and i are SOON going to be united.

Lesson for the Day: Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, so take good care of it, so that you can serve Him effectively.

Until today, Lydia had never fainted before. But i suppose, there is a first time for everything!

4 hours of sleep + no breakfast + no lunch + giving blood on a day when its 46 degrees with humidity+ class where the AC is broken= NOT A GOOD IDEA!

i went and gave blood today, without having eaten lunch or breakfast... felt okay...and then ran off to class. got to class, and we were watching this cool video on punishment. i got all excited about the video, because they mentioned how Christians were once really persecuted, and they talked a lot about stoning and cruxifixions and such. i was thinking about how i could segue into the gospel during the ensuing group discussion, when i started to feel really dizzy. i started to feel as though i was going to vomit, so i stood up, maneuvered my way out of the classroom..and i remember thinking to myself...i just need to stop and rest for a second. So i grasped the wall just outside of the classroom.

The next thing i remembered was hearing my knees hit the tiled floor and thinking to myself, oh i'll just rest here for a second. everything went black, and the next thing i know, i was in a fetal position, a man was tapping me on the back asking me if i needed help. He helped me up, and took me to the arts and science office....where they gave me juice and told me to sit for awhile. i was shaking pretty badly and sweating like a madwoman--literally drops of sweat dripping down my face!

sat there for awhile, got back in time for the class break, asked my prof if i could go early...but she said that if i did, i'd lose participation marks and would miss her lecture. So i stayed the whole time...completely out of it and totally zonked.

Now i am home..but i wish i had taken better care of myself. because if i had, maybe i would have been "sane" enough to share the gospel with my classmates during group discussion.

moral of the story: lydia is going to take much better care of herself, because you can't share the gospel if you're worried that you're going to hurl or faint again.

been scanning a lot of my photos from the past couple years in...thought i might as well make a trip down memory lane.

grade 9 grad. the greatest thing is...that i'm still friends with most of these girls. in september it'll be 9 years of knowing each other.












grade 9 grad party at church. the two girls beside me used to be everything to me..

we don't talk at all nowadays.

bff? i guess not. we had some good times though.








cleaning out the locker for the last time in grade 12.









last ballet class in edmonton.













OEX 2004 orientation.


















i love this shot...just because Warren looks so great in it.










yes...i brought THAT much toilet paper on OEX.

















So...what CAN you do?











what would i ever DO without these boys?

yes.... that is a transformers poster. YES, they bargained for it.
YES it involved me getting embarassed.

congrats to my OEX teammate and fellow francophone, Michael....who is getting married August 26th!










qi pao hotness.



















the three OEX 04 babies.

sangi is also getting hitched august 26th.











done and done.