Low on the Go!

hmmm before i become nostalgic, i just wanted to say that Darren didn't ACTUALLY compare me to satan..he implied it. Also, another addendum..what Darren said, or what I post on my blog are of my own thoughts and opinions and don’t necessarily represent Campus Crusade for Christ’s ministry’s positions, strategies or opinions.

last times.

It's hard to articulate how I'm feeling right now. I have never started something that I have not seen through to completion, but tonight, as I stood at the front of the banquet hall, I realized that ministry at U of T is not something that can be completed, at least not until Jesus comes.In less than two weeks, I will no longer actively be involved in the campus ministry at U of T and in Toronto, and so a large part of tonight was saying goodbye and letting go.

As I stood at the front of the banquet hall, I hadn't really prepared what to say. I had known I wanted to say something; Andrew and I had agreed that we would feel as though we lacked closure had we not said anything. Nevertheless, words did not seem enough. Words are not enough to convey how much God has used campus ministry to touch my life, how it has given me a reason to wake up in the morning, in the face of severe depression, or how beautiful it was tonight to see so many fresh faces--all the result of the gospel and His manifestation among university students in Toronto.

As I graduate, I will not miss school. I will not miss late nights spent cramming or countless hours spent writing essays which mean little to me beyond a decent grade. I will not miss the depression I have struggled through and I will not miss the tension that exists between wanting to constantly be doing ministry, but having to spend time stuffing my head with knowledge.

I will, however, miss the people and miss watching the movement at U of T blossom into something more beautiful than it already is. I will miss my one on one dates with J, and my one on one times with the cutest girl in C4C and my goan llama friend. I will miss lunches with Warren, and talking ministry with Andrew, who has also seen his campus grow from a handful of people to outrageous numbers. I will miss jamming and going to concerts with Joshua, and I wish I was friends with Steven Morel, because it would have been fun to have jammed with him more. I will miss the musical talent in Toronto and I will miss shooting with Holga and Camille. I will even miss walking to campus and crying every morning because I want to see my campus reached with the gospel. I will miss servant team meetings with Valera, Johnny and Kim. Even though they were few and far between, we are a fun team. Gong show.

There are so many things I will miss. Mostly, I will miss people. I am scared to leave Toronto, because never in my life have I had such beautiful friends, and I am scared that I will be forgotten, or that I will forget.