Low on the Go!

love languages.


At the beginning of this year, J (anette) asked me what my top love languages are. Prior to this, I hadn't paid much attention to these so called love languages, because, lets be honest, the book cover itself looks really cheesy, let alone the title "love languages". To me, it seemed rather irrelevant and ultra-feminine.

A couple of days ago, however, I was talking to my dear friend, Warren, and I decided that knowing what our own "love languages" are, and what those of our friends are, is pretty important for our relationships. Essentially, a love language, is the way in which an individual communicates and receives love from others (oh goodness, this post is ALREADY sounding super cheese).

It becomes important, because inherent in the love languages we use, is our definition of friendship. For example, I was telling Warren, that I don't consider people who I rarely spend time with friends. For me to count someone as a friend, I generally need to spend time regularly with them. In my mind, this makes sense. After all, how can you be friends with someone when you don't spend time getting to know them?
On the other hand, Warren said that he considers a friend anyone who, if he needed help, would be willing to do something for him. So, a friend (even a good friend) could be someone he only occasionally (or even rarely) hangs out with, but would be willing to push him around in a wheelchair, were he ever a quadriplegic.
These two definitions of friendship are not mutually exclusive, however, one method of definition may dominate over another when someone is defining their friendships.

Thinking about this made good sense to me. It's important to realize that some people may not value quality time as much as I do, so when they don't hang out with me, or when they don't shift around their schedule for me, like I would do for them, it does not mean they do not care for me, it's just that they express their love in differing ways. Concurrently, if I am not always doing things for Warren, it does not mean I don't value him as a friend, I just might not realize that he prizes acts of service more than quality time.

Once this realization is made, it follows then, that we should strive to get to know one another's love languages, so that we can express love to them in a way they would appreciate and that is relevant.

Hmm...how key this is in discipleship.

Anyways, those are just some thoughts. Enough cheese for today!