endings.
I've never been particularly good with endings. I detest approaching the ending of a book I'm reading, because it means I'll have to dig my teeth into another one. I hate the ending of a movie, because all of a sudden I find myself sucked back into reality. I dread approaching the ending of my bubble tea drink, because it means that I've eaten all the bubbles, and there isn't much more to look forward to.
I don't like endings.
I know that Montreal is where God has called me to. I see a need there. But moving to Montreal and starting a new life there means leaving Toronto, and ending life here. For four years, Toronto has become home, in a way Edmonton never was. This weekend, three of my guy friends helped me move all my stuff from Toronto to Montreal. They sacrificed their weekend, their time, their sleep, finances etc. to help me move. This was no small task. Friends who would do this are rare. For four years, people have shown me love and friendship in a way that I never knew could be possible. I know that when people move away, they say that they'll miss a place. It's almost cliche. But the truth is, I really will miss Toronto. I'll miss my friends, I'll miss the city, I'll miss C4C people, and I'll miss my church.
Right now, I am sitting in the middle of my room. My apartment is empty, and one of my roommates has completely moved out. The other has almost fully moved out. Goodbyes have been said, for the most part.
I am sitting here, and I am lonely.
I've never been particularly good with endings. I detest approaching the ending this Toronto chapter, because it means I'll have to dig my teeth into a new chapter. I am sad thinking about the end of Toronto, because these past months have been a blur of goodness and I know that all of a sudden I will find myself sucked back into reality.
One week and one day before I leave Toronto. One week and one day to say goodbye to everyone I love.
Let's make it good.
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4 commentaires:
Oh my goodness, this post is so sad.
Endings are always bittersweet. Beginnings are always difficult, but once you get past all that, the middle is where it gets good. I'm trying to go with your book analogy. Make your remaining TO time something to remember:)
Re: "I'm a woman... hear me roar"(your past post): I totally understand how you feel, trust me. I have a couple anecdotes where I've questioned whether my natural aggressiveness interferes with my female character. And don't worry, you've got plenty of femininity, hahahahaa....
:( So sad......
But Montreal is a great city... and after all... the best is still yet to come :D
Where there is an ending there is always a new beginning. I know it's difficult, but the paths that God takes us on, His plan A, is always best even when it doesn't feel like it. You're so friendly, that you'll make a whole bunch of new friends in no time and with internet, the old ones aren't too far away. Chin up!
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