mercredi, août 23, 2006

all i want for christmas are my two teeth.

well not really. the teeth are out, and i feel great. there's been no bleeding, and i haven't really needed to take any meds. so thats the down low on the teeth.

in other news, have you ever been given a gift that you don't want? Its not unlike that Jesus with the sheep picture (i think its a picture of Jesus?) that keeps circulating around Ryerson because Ryan Kirk didn't want it. No one wants it, so they keep on giving it away at Christmastime and such.

Well, there are just some days that i don't want the gifts i've been given. Most of the time, however, its for selfish reasons. i don't want the hassle of dealing with the gift; having the gift means using it, and using it may not always reap the most pleasant results.

So why am i rambling on about Christmas gifts in August? Well, the truth is...sometimes, i think of my spiritual gifts as a hassle. i forget that these are GOOD gifts given by the Spirit for the common good. i forget that these gifts are not just for me to hoard, that i haven't done anything to deserve them and that it is the Spirit who has generously invested these gifts to me.

there are days however, when i just don't want to heed God and use these gifts. sometimes, its so much easier not to. it's almost akin to being given a vacuum for Christmas. a vacuum is a great gift. it makes your house clean and gets rid of dust, so that you and your family (and visitors) can enjoy the house without suffering from dirt and allergic reactions. BUT, sometimes its just such a hassle (in chinese, we say its ma fan) to vacuum every day. its not always fun and it requires work to use it. after a couple of months, we forget that this vacuum cleaner was a gift to us, and we are no longer grateful for this wretched treasure.

often times, the LORD brings to mind things that He wants me to point out to people. He points out some truth that He would like me to speak to my close friends. This, i would consider the gift of prophecy--speaking truth into the lives of others. Often times, it'll be doing my quiet times, or praying for friends that i receive these little gems of wisdom from the LORD; it is by no means me passing judgement on my friends (although, if i'm not careful and i allow my pride to swell, i can end up judging them), but rather the LORD wanting me to point out something to them. Often times, its just a small thing, nothing huge...but after noticing these things, i mull over the decision to say something to them for a long time. i know what the LORD wants me to do, what He wants me to say...but my untrusting and doubtful heart gets in the way. i worry about what my friends will say back to me; i worry that they will no longer be my friends. i'd rather run to Tarshish than go to Nineveh.

fundamentally, what this says to me, is that
a) i often prize my friends over my LORD
b) i love myself more than my friends: i am often stubborn and unwilling to point out a sin or some character trait that Abba wants to mould and work on in their life, because i'm scared that they won't like me. instead of caring more about their walk with the LORD and with others, i care more about myself. hmm...loving my life more than the LORD? mm...not such a great idea. its a bit tautological, since it is Jesus Christ who gives me life.
c) i don't trust the living Spirit in me. i don't trust that it is He who has given me these gifts and who is at work, empowering me to be His hands and feet. i fail to trust in the promise that for those who love God all things work together for good.

what does the Bible have to say about this?

a) Do not love the world or the things in the world. if anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.....and the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever. (1 Jn 15, 17)

b) Again, if a righteous person turns from his righteousness and commits injustice, and I lay a stumbling block before him, he shall die. because you have not warned him, he shall die for his sin, and his righteous deeds that he has done shall not be remembered, but his blood i shall require at your hand. But if you warn the righteous person not to sin and he does not sin, he shall surely live, because he took warning, and you will have delivered your soul. (Ezekiel 3:20-21)

c) and there are a variety of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. (1 Cor 12:6-7)

hmm, i suppose at the core is a prideful, unbelieving heart. and yet, why am i unbelieving when i have seen His goodness and experienced His grace? Often times my love for the world clouds my desire to prize Him above all else. And yet, when everything is said and done, and the world is no more, the only One i will have is Him. thus, like our forefathers in the Bible, my goal should be not to love myself...but to love, cherish, obey and glorify the One who made me. this may mean speaking truth into the lives of others when i am unsure of how they will react. but my foothold should not be found in their friendship (although friendship is a lovely thing), but rather, in Christ, the solid rock.

4 commentaires:

Anonyme a dit...

you know... this summer has made me love the gift of prophecy. I seriously love it. It excites me. I think of it as "loving someone enough to risk your relationship with them." Although, I rarely am worried how a person will react, unless i know that they are extremely sensitive... since I tend to be on the blunt side of things. It's just plain and simple: X is sin, so get over it & stop doing it. I fully expect people to do that in return, and those who i've been blunt with have relished their opportunities to be blunt with me.

see??? I HEART PROPHECY. i could write an essay... and i'm getting more happy by the second as i type this. ahh the Spirit is soo cool.

Anonyme a dit...

i heart u lydia so much!!!

i wish i was this insightful after my wisdom teeth being pulled out.

although, i was on meds so i have an excuse! ahahah

Anonyme a dit...

I praise God for this fantastic post and in itself a great word of prophecy. It is a great thing to be made aware of especially right before the coming school year and C4C stuff.

Anonyme a dit...

Lydia, I started writing you a reply to this post last Friday and then I got busy and then weddings happened and it's still sitting there on my screen at home in the Guelph... and then when I go back this weekend .. I'll publish it. :)