Low on the Go!

rise, pick up your bed and go home.

I awoke this morning to a sinking heart, full of condemnation directed towards myself. I often struggle in the mornings. I struggle to believe in His goodness, to believe in His sovereignty, to believe in His plans. Things I learn the night before seem far away, and it is easy to slip into self-pity. Today I woke up, and began to listen to thoughts hitting me like jarring needles. 6:57am. Though i wanted to go back to sleep, I could not.

"You're not beautiful enough."
"You're not good enough."
"How could you have thought that? You should have been smarter."
"It's all your fault."
"Maybe if you were more ____(insert positive adjective here)___"

I need to combat these lies with truth. As a female, or perhaps, as a human, it is so easy to belittle ourselves when we don't receive anticipated affirmation from friends, family members, coworkers etc. It's so easy to believe that we are worthless, and to fall into a pattern of self-condemnation and guilt. But in 1 Peter, we see that Jesus did not receive his sense of worth from man, for he was rejected by men. He was chosen by God; this is what made Him beautiful and precious; this is what made Him worthy.

You and I, we too have been chosen by God. Our worth is not determined by how much we appraise ourselves to be worth. It isn't determined by the affections of others, nor is it determined by our actions. In reality, we are worth nothing, bound to return to dust, and enslaved to death. But Jesus made Himself sacrificially available so that we might be freed from this; He was beaten and made lame, so that we, the lame could arise and walk.

So, I'll pick up my mat and walk.

"When God sent His only Son, Jesus, to this earth to bear your sin and mine on the cross, He put a price tag on us--He declared the value of our soul to be greater than the value of the whole world." (Nancy Leigh DeMoss)