Low on the Go!

fonts.

A lot of people have been asking me if Edmonton is really as lonely as I make it out to be. "Is that even possible, to not have any friends, " they ask.

Yes, yes..it really is.

"What do you do during the day?"

That is a very good question.

Since support raising is moving so slowly here, I often don't have very many appointments. Today was one such day. I woke up, spent some time reading the Bible and worked on my monthly update letter. Once that was done, I had nothing to do, so for the better part of 2-3 hours, I looked at different font faces online.

Yes. I perused through hundreds and hundreds of free fonts.

But, today was a better day than yesterday. I spent a lot of time yesterday feeling angry and bitter at everyone. Especially God. Him and I hadn't been talking for awhile. For about a week, I had stopped praying and stopped reading the Bible. Not only has my life been pretty banal and quiet lately, God has also been very quiet. It has been over a month since I've really gleaned something from the Word, and because of the lack of fellowship, there hasn't really been anyone to talk to about things I'm reading in the Word.

Yesterday was the day I finally acknowledged my frustration at God. Not only has he brought me to a place where friends are few and far between, He himself has also remained so stiffly silent, and support raising is moving slower than a snail's pace. I was angry.

But last night, someone told me to read Isaiah 35...and a couple of verses really stood out at me. It was almost jarring, the way they stood out:

Strengthen the weak hands,
and make firm the feeble knees.
Say to those who have an anxious heart,
"Be strong; fear not!"

Then the eyes of the blind shall be opened,
and the ears of the deaf unstopped;
then shall the lame man leap like a deer,
and the tongue of the mute sing for joy.
For waters break forth in the wilderness
and streams in the desert;
the burning sand shall become a pool,
and the thirsty ground springs of water.


Talking to a friend tonight, he also brought up the illustration of me being in the desert.

I've known that I've been in the desert; let's be honest...how could I not know? But I've been resentful instead of clinging to the hope that water will break forth in this wilderness. Yet, THIS is what faith is. It is being assured of things hoped for, convicted of things not seen. Getting out of here is something totally unseen. I don't know when the next time I will see my Toronto friends will be, or when I'll make it to Montreal. But at the same time, I know an end will come, so I will greet it from afar.

In the meantime, I will continue to peruse through a hundred more fonts.